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Life of Riley: Let's hear it for fools!
Let's hear it for fools! @column int = Aboard this ship of fools you will find all kinds: the ... is a dish of stewed fruit mixed with custard. It's what? — One who feigns folly for the ... entertainment of others. And that's you, is it? — Did you know that the medieval clergy celebrated the ...
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Life of Riley: Mum
demonstrating! You don't say. It turns out she's taken a very poor view of the Coalition. Grave robbers ... she's taken to filing newspaper clippings under her bed. "Keeping abreast of the times", she ... into it. Down at the bowls club she's known for it. They call her the "voice of the ...
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Life of Riley: Keeping us safe from marauding queue jumpers
of the water. By Dave Riley <dhell@ozemail.com.au> January 19, 2000 389 ... drinking. On a beach no less. Happy little vegemites doing our all to catch the rays of the sun through our ... other fella are all girt by sea — a substance renowned for keeping the rest of the world away. ...
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Life of Riley: Bill gets his 15 minutes
on you, I say. That's what life's all about, and, unlike the rest of us, you've got ... It's Bill Hayden, I tell you. I'm sure of it. He wrote a book about himself and got all that ... rest of the office on Monday. He's looking up again — Excuse me, but aren't you Bill Hayden? ...
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Life of Riley: It has come!
surfeit of news. I was the speaker of that BLAAAAH, and my utterance was noted by many of those around me. ... at the morning daily before me. I did not open my mouth for any purpose of articulation but thought ... conflict was visiting our shores. I thought the business of class, or business class, was simply a question ...
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Life of Riley: Santa and me
and preferably sons of the Church at that. We were scheduled to gather as a body each week for ... topic of Why we are in Vietnam (it being 1967 at the time), B.A. unexpectedly arrived and sat next to ... in Vietnam because... During discussion B.A.'s praise of my presentation was fulsome. I'd ...
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Life of Riley: The bit what's left
The bit what's left In a standard working day of eight hours, it may take me four hours to ... produce the equivalent of my wages. If the time needed to cover my wage packet is reduced from four to two ... on the movements of the bit what's left. It is generally conceded that increases in the total ...
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Life of Riley: Have gun, will travel
way you would hire a carpenter to fix a fence — to return order and good government to the island of ... a profit. Of course we do. War is not a Sunday picnic. People get hurt. No pain, no gain, I always say. You ... is at the cutting edge of industrial reform. Instead of relying on a permanent work force with all ...
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Life of Riley: When your world's in a dither
of our (a) military or (b) finance division? Unfortunately, here at New World Order we can only ... authorise interventions which bail out or blow up at their point of contact. So which is it to be? Whether ... your UN resolution number if you were planning on a course of action that could possibly require the ...
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Life of Riley: Trespassers prosecuted
underpants) to visit these shores was Lemuel Gulliver. His visit down-under was to the outback settlement of ... Lilliput, which was located in the inland region of what is now known as Western Australia. See if I'm ... a beach at some distance from the briny and within cooee of Uluru. This spot is not now listed on any ...
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Life of Riley: Let's blockade Tassie!
Let's blockade Tassie! Tasmania lies due south of the continent of Australia, 240 kilometres ... from the mainland. The island of Cuba is a little closer to its northern neighbour, being 217 ... kilometres from the tip of Florida. While Cuba is 35% larger than Tassie there are approximately 9,996,461 ...
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Life of Riley: Aliens
a stick at, your run of the mill Asiatic has their back to the wall. There's hunger and hardship like ... you wouldn't believe. But here, just a few ks south of where all that soy sauce and chili is ... swishing about, Mr or Ms Average can knock off at the end of a work week with a pay packet of $737.70. And ...
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Life of Riley: What! Me worry?
credited. Here I was thinkin' that I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. All those years ... Yeah. Right. Don't get me wrong. I was my own worst enemy. Sometimes I think I'm no judge of ... my problem is that I take life too seriously. I worry too much. You're not alone in that. Maybe ...
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Life of Riley: I love rupiah
a collection of the many pronouncements made about our near neighbour to the north by professional scribes of ... one kind or another. I do not suppose that there is a decent man or woman within the four walls of ... Indonesia, the consequences can be terrible indeed. Why, even the whole of Jakarta could go up in flames ...
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Life of Riley: Dot-dot-dot-dash-dash-dash-dot-dot-dot
SOS. This is Asia. Position 45 N 150 E 90 W. Stop engine. We need assistance." Of course you heard ... particular region of the global economy hope to gain by coming to us cap in hand? Asia: Aid, please, sir. ... their little yellow commie behinds real good. Asia: We soon learned to love the smell of napalm in the ...
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Life of Riley: Honourable intentions
call 1 million votes a cut back. That's a lot of would-be racists. And Kernot — — Whatever you say ... seriously believe that! Come on now. Don't tell me you think Kernot is some sort of Joan of Arc? ... — Well, she's sure to have more backbone than the rest of them. Each to their own, I suppose. But ...
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Life of Riley: To GST or not
— that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of ... outrageous fortune, or to take up arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them? PRIME MINISTER ... Sorry. [Exit PRIME MINISTER] HAMLET: Now you've done it! I've lost my train of thought. ...
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Life of Riley: Food and revolution
This is not the place to itemise my ADL — my "activities of daily living". Suffice to say ... don't care to comment on the pressing problems of the world? MYSELF: You misunderstand me. I'll ... you talk of food at a time like this? It's time to raise the alarm. It's time to fight. ...
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Life of Riley: Men don't
I've never had one, you see. It's one of those categorical differences between women and men that ... so. But if a woman does it... it becomes something of a legal event. I think that's a bit unfair. ... It's OK that anything which happens below my belt is my business. But for a woman, anything south of ...
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Life of Riley: Sound the trumpet
a degree of something or other. On the Y2K thing, we're expectant. Come the end of the ... year/decade/century/millennium we could see in the new year on the computer. But in terms of a nice night's entertainment, ... much like the 21st. I ask you: is that a good thing? Don't get me wrong — I'm a boy of the ...