Orwell redux: 'Collect it all'

June 6, 2019
Issue 

Here鈥檚 to the NSA and to ASD
We learned it before and learned for free
They know all about you and me.
Big Brother is watching

Are you familiar with the NSA?
鈥淐ollect it all鈥 is what they always pray,*
Your phone calls, your emails, every day.
Big Brother collects it all

If you emailed your friend to criticise
The government鈥檚 latest policy lies
And it鈥檚 quoted in court, don鈥檛 feel surprise.
Big Brother was listening

If your union faction fight is all the go
Amid months of strife on budgets or so,
Don鈥檛 be shocked if NSA鈥檚 in the know.
Big Brother is watching

You鈥檙e doing nothing wrong yourself, I鈥檒l bet,
You have no secrets in your cabinet,
You are the straightest citizen I鈥檝e met,
But Big Brother is snooping

But as a teenager you were texting,
Seeking this thing or the next thing
Then you tried new-fangled sexting
But Big Brother was ogling

You may well bleat about civil rights
But they have vanished out of sight
Your privacy鈥檚 in a terrible plight
Big Brother is winning

But the NSA鈥檚 American, yes?
Why should we feel the slightest distress?
It can鈥檛 happen in Australia, I guess.
Here, Big Brother鈥檚 benign?

Well, the latest fun is a new report
That they鈥檙e wanting to take to court
A journalist who can鈥檛 be bought
Big Brother is angry

She found a revealing scoop that鈥檚 great:
The national security state
Is planning ASD powers to inflate.
Big Brother鈥檚 expanding!

(One aspect where we are amused:
It鈥檚 a Newscorp journalist being abused
The air鈥檚 with indignation suffused
But Big Brother鈥檚 Murdoch鈥檚 buddy!)

But why should we care about this flurry?
Why all this frantic fuss and hurry?
Peter Dutton鈥檚 in charge, so not to worry,
Big Brother loves us

For it鈥檚 only baddies he will smother
Or anyone who looks like The Other
Or terrorists (maybe Sudanese rather)
So we must all love Big Brother

*One of Edward Snowden's revelations.

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